The following is a post I actually wrote about a week ago. However, it was never posted because right when I finished writing it, I lost internet. Since then, I have barely had time to breathe, much less post a blog. But alas! A few moments of free time have found their way into my life, and so here is the post that is now a week old. Sorry about that 🙂 :
This is now my third attempt today at writing a new blog entry. Since arriving in Middletown, Maryland we have been basically working nonstop – setting up camp, making name tags, preparing for registration, organizing rec equipment, setting up the store, putting the audi together, and trying to figure out how all 19 of us are going to live in a house together for the next 4 weeks. (Actually, make that 20 of us – one of the occupants is a recently discovered mouse whom we have dubbed Fieval. He likes to make random appearances throughout the house…)
We just came from a week in Ridgecrest, North Carolina – which stands out in stark contrast to our previous location in St. Petersburg, Florida. In Florida, I would step outside and immediately start sweating. In North Carolina, I wore a jacket half the morning. In Florida, I was surrounded by palm trees, water, and dolphins. In North Carolina, I had to walk 20 minutes up a mountain in order to reach the rec field.
And now here I am in Maryland, my third state in the span of about 3 weeks.
And this is why I love travelling with CentriKid.
All the weeks thus far are starting to blur together in a plethora of memories: van rides, Fiesta Explosions, fireworks, hiking mountains, cheers about bears, the Captain’s Oar, sign language, OMC, parties, lots of fast food, lots of cafeteria food, budget loading, late nights, intentional convos, dance parties, awkward moments, Ravenclaw jerseys, cow costumes, B.O.G., junk food, fish bowl, teacher stare, T.A.G. Team, and about a million others all combine to describe the last 7 (or however many) weeks.
But in the midst of all those memories, there is one truth God has been laying on my heart these past few weeks that I cannot ignore:
This entire summer is worth nothing unless my eyes are fixed on Christ. My biggest stumbling block this summer has been to become preoccupied with the “results” – there have been times that I have been consumed with thoughts that, because I am not seeing fruit, I am serving no purpose. I have an incredible burden on my heart for the kids and adults that come to camp each week. My desire for them is that they know Christ and have a relationship with Him that affects and changes every aspect of their lives. I want kids to have their eyes opened to their need for the Gospel, to the incredible truth that apart from Christ we are dead. That there is nothing in and of ourselves even remotely capable of bridging the immeasurable gap between us and God. I want them to feel the weight of that truth. And then I want them to rejoice in the beauty of Christ’s sacrifice, of His payment for our sins, of His building of a bridge between us and God so that we might have a true relationship with Him.
I think about it constantly. The thought that kids or adults could be caught in spiritual deception or remain blinded to the truth of the Gospel burns in my chest every day.
And the hardest thing is recognizing that I cannot do anything about it. I. Am. Not. God.
Only God, in His grace, can change a heart and draw someone to Himself. Only God can open up a person’s eyes to his or her need for redemption. I will not make that change happen.
In 2 Timothy Paul talks about how he is willing to endure all things for those whom God has called – he sees the big picture, or the end goal. He understands that ultimately, he is called to share the Gospel of Christ and leave the results to God. In verse 8 he says to “keep in mind Jesus Christ” – not the people, or the results, or how much he suffers or how hard he works – but Christ, and Christ alone.
The author of Hebrews also talks about “keeping in mind Jesus Christ” by saying, “let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.” Christ Himself did not allow Himself to be preoccupied with the things of this world, but rather He endured the things in this world because of the joy that was set before Him – Christ saw the bigger picture.
And every day I hear God telling me the same thing – to fix my eyes on Christ, my ultimate goal. No matter how kids may respond to me, or how Bible study goes, or how well a drill runs in volleyball – my focus, my aim, must be Christ. He is my motivation and my encouragement for doing anything – especially camp 🙂
Mary Holloman 